i feel bad, i feel pretty dreadful, again. sigh im actually incredibly self contious constantly posting negative blogs.
im half way through my 400g of chocolate. and ive eaten my lovehearts, all of them, maybe thats a metaphor? im going to do some more art soon, i have so much to do its unbelieveable. i dont think i can do it, i dont think i can actually do much at the moment, i feel pathetic. i wish there was a way to make myself feel better, because im tired of this, i hope i dont feel like this on christmas because i dont want to bring everyone else down.
i cant believe it, i cut myself last night, i havent done for quite a while, around 2 months, but i did it yesterday, well technically it was this morning, it was sheer desperation i had no one, i felt so alone, i do now, i slept for 13 hours last night because i felt so low, and i still dont feel great, im restless and anxious, irritable and alone, what can i do to make myself feel better. im tired of this feeling, im tired of everything, im tired of my fucking life.
3 comments:
Oh man, I know this is just a comment on your page but I hope it trasnlates and I know you'd help it if you could but you have to remember everything coming up, the future before you do anything to hurt yourself. Everything coming is something that hasn't happened yet and that's a positive way to think. I'm not very good at explaining but what I mean is there's so much to look forward to and you can't keep hurting yourself simply for what's happened. Things are really bad right now but you have to look forward or you'll just get stuck in the cycle. I hope things get better for you, really xx
i would focus on the future, but right now the future looks bleak, there isnt anything im looking forward to, as if im stuck in a limbo of negativity.
i hurt myself, for the way i feel about myself, for what a waste of life i am. :/
thank you, and i understand what you said, its just hard to stop feeling so low and so down. and thank you for your comment.
Danielx
what is your msn, soul mate? :O
Well, you don't actually have to tell me.
And I haven't cut for something like two months as well, becasue when I do people threaten to stop being friends with me. But I don't think its that bad really, as long as you aren't doing huge deep cuts everyday, because it actually makes me feel somewhat better.
I want to talk to you though, unless thats creepy.
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