Insomnia

3:31,

ive just finished fight club, im going to try and sleep in a minute, itll be sunrise soon?
sigh, fuckidy fuck fuck fuck fucking fuck!
thats how i feel, i want to sleep.

im angry about that,
but im not actually feeling angry.

i have a smile on my face,
idont often say that, i dont smile much,
but today (yesterday) was a good day. Fo Shiz.
ive needed one, id had 10 bad days in a row, i think my medication needs to go up,

it worries me how this medication i dont know what is in it, sure i take a2 biology, and know how antidepressants work and such, but someone couldve pissed in the concoxtion whilst making it, ive watched too much fight club, i shouldve watched st. elmo's fire, that was my second choice. sigh. probably happier than fight club.

anyway, apparently several million people worldwide are taking these friolitipran or prozac, or whatever theyre taking, which controls their mood receptors or whatnot, including me, and people are okay with that, it freaks me out, thinking about it, and we're told not to look them up because youll find horror stories. this sounds dodgy, it worries me, maybe its because im in a state of subcontious, where as Edward Norton put it, "im neither asleep nor awake" because thats how i feel.

but happy at the same time.
so thank you, you know who you are.

i hope youre okay, ill look at this blog tomorrow with regret for writing tosh.
Danielx