I feel so.

What am I supposed to do, when the way I act is represented by the way I feel,

I feel so smothered so I push people away,
I feel so alone because I push them away,
I feel so terrible by pushing them away,
I feel so guilty because they shouldn't have to deal with it, so I push them away.
I feel so angry when they don't appear to care about what's wrong.
I feel so sad that no one knows how to help.
I feel so desperate when I have no one to talk to I react flippantly when I'm depressed.
I feel so alone because I push them away.

I had an argument with my friend Mikaela, and I don't know what to do.